Idiots Say The Damndest Things

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Schlapp Fight

« May 2018 »

Memo to Maggie Haberman and the Schlapps: YOU DESERVED WORSE.

The White House Correspondents Dinner was this weekend, and it went about as well as can be expected, with Michelle Wolf calling out everyone in the room for being awful assholes and all the awful assholes in the room not liking it. It did, however, lead to IDIOTS SAYING THE DAMNDEST THINGS!

”That @PressSec sat and absorbed intense criticism of her physical appearance, her job performance, and so forth, instead of walking out, on national television, was impressive.” - Maggie Haberman of the New York Times, who apparently needs Sanders to keep returning her calls.

Let’s clear this up right the fuck now. Sarah Huckabee Sanders is not a hostage. She’s not a decent person put in an untenable position with a difficult job and no options available to her. She is a willing participant in the Trump administration, happily lying to the press every time she speaks to them and then trying to make it seem like it’s the press’s fault she’s doing it. She’s not a victim, she’s part of the problem.

I mean, the MIchelle Wolf / White House Correspondents Dinner fake outrage fest is mostly over, with asshat MSNBC Republicans like Andrea Mitchell and Scarzinski acting shocked, SHOCKED, that someone would violate the norms of Washington D.C. polite society and Wolf understands this shit and told everyone they could fuck off and enjoyed all the free promotion in advance of her Netflix show. But the whole thing, and more specifically the way it was led by media figures, should remind you of just who they serve the next time they ask you to subscribe to their papers to save democracy.

”Just present the facts and let the American people if they think someone’s lying. Journalists shouldn’t be the one to say the President or his spokesperson is lying. What that does to 50 percent of the country is make them feel they are not credible to listen to.” - Mark Schlapp, chairman of some damn thing called the American Conservative Union.

I don’t think I knew who Mark Schlapp and his lovely wife Mercedes were before this weekend, which is another reason the WHCD can die in a very hot fire. They’re a couple of assholes, rich off lobbying and Wingnut Welfare. Mercedes is now the “Director of Strategic Communications” at the White House, a job clearly akin to Unicorn Wrangler at the San Diego Zoo. They rose to prominence this weekend by tweeting about how they stormed out of the WHCD, tired of being shit on by the “elites”.

Schlapp’s view, that journalists shouldn’t tell people the president is lying because it will make them feel bad, is an interesting view. What he’s saying is that the press should simply report facts other than the fact that the president is lying, and let people who are emotionally incapable of handling the idea that Trump is a liar come to the conclusion that Trump is a liar naturally. That man makes more money than you will ever see with opinions like that, and he thinks that makes us a meritocracy.

“I mean, I’m not trying to act like I’m driving a garbage truck in Des Moines” - Schlapp, again, responding to the New York Times pointing out that in any eliteness competition with Michelle Wolf, he’s the clear winner.

Real Americans are fucking idiots. I’m sorry, but all these economically anxious racist fucking garbage truck drivers from Des Moines and ordinary blue collar folk who go down to the salad bar at Applebee’s and get mad at Mexicans somehow don’t realize all the people claiming to represent them or be simpatico with them or speak for them reveal their bluest of blood at the slightest provocation.

I mean, Schlapp literally seems to think that the world consists of people who make a good living shoving garbage around from one place to another, and working class folks from the Midwest in the sanitation industry. But every year, “flyover country” decides that some asshole who campaigns in a pickup truck cares about them. At least for the most part we know our people are rich assholes.

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