You Are Dumb, which is not a blog, posts new columns every weekday, except for most Tuesdays and the occasional fuckbotch. It is also a Twitter feed, @youaredumb, with content in a similar vein but much shorter. For a take on what a blog by me would be like, check out OLDNERD.
Spastic Topic Monkey Friday
Memo to Hillary Clinton, Iran Warmongers, and Michael Bay: YOU ARE DUMB.
Two huge political events this week that I don't give two shits about. Obama's final State of the Union adress was fine, and the reaction to it was predictable, but the whole thing seemed like exhausted, worn-out rote. Obama was optimistic. Republicans made sure Kim Davis was in the audience. And then last night there were another couple of Republican debates, but those I'll deal with later. Right now, it's SPASTIC TOPIC MONKEY FRIDAY!
If you want to know why I'm going to throw a likely pointless protest vote for Bernie Sanders when the primary finally makes its way to Minnesota, look no further than the Clinton camp's attacks on Sanders over health care. Because right there, you have everything that's wrong with Hillary, everything that's wrong with the Clintons, and everything that's wrong with their brand of centrist Democrat bullshit.
Sanders, of course, believes in single-payer. And for the past couple of weeks, Clinton has been characterising this as "dismantling Obamacare", and yesterday, "ending all the kinds of health care we know". Which, yes, a single-payer system would do. Well, sort of. Single-payer is a type of health care we know, just not a type we use. Mischaracterizing and fearmongering about single-payer, a solidly liberal and ultimately practical idea, to try to score points in a narrowing race is some bullshit, and Clinton is lucky that if she wins, she'll be running for President against some of the worst human beings walking around on two legs.
Of all the things I saw this week, the dick-waving warmongering over the Iranian boat nothing was the one that really reminded me that I live in a world full of crazy people. A couple of Navy boats "ended up" in Iranian water somehow, got captured, then got released due to quick diplomacy less than a day later, unharmed.
Yet I watched even the supposed "liberal" media treat Iran's photos of the captured soldiers as some sort of horrific insult and mistreatment. Oh noes, our brave soldiers had to put their hands on their heads and get on their knees because they got caught in foreign waters! Those dastardly Iranians, treating their prisoners like prisoners! Maybe we could divert a tiny fraction of that outrage and sympathy for, say, a Tamir Rice, who didn't have time to put his hands anywhere.
Maybe we should try having our foreign policy debates at something higher than a third-grade level.
Don't forget to not go see 13 Hours this weekend! Michael Bay's documentary of Sean Hannity's Benghazi wet dreams is earning rave reviews from critics, for a sufficiently loose definition of "critic". Megyn Kelly, for example, found it "riveting", according to an ad they're actually running on actual television.
Other "reviewers" include the Weekly Standard and the National Review, so if someone could measure the angular momentum inside Pauline Kael's grave, I'd appreciate it. Still, it's nice to see Michael Bay deliberately marketing movies to conservatives these days, instead of just making incredibly stupid movies and expecting all the conservatives to show up.