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Memo to Michael Sebastian: WE UNDERSTAND FICTION.

It's Men's Rights M'Tuesday, thanks to extenuating circumstances, and once again the Internet's version of the trash compactor monsters are demonstrating a hilarious relationship with the nature of reality. Today's heap of rotting fish is one Michael Sebastian, and his headline and clumsy thesis statement is: "Why Do SJWs Like Game Of Thrones When It Stands For Everything They’re Against?"

Quick answer: Game of Thrones isn't real. It's fake. Fictional. Now, I wouldn't say I like Game of Thrones, but I have watched it, only bailing after the last season when I could have easily bailed the season prior. But still, how I feel about a work of fiction's politics doesn't automatically affect how I feel about the fiction, because that's not actually a requirement to be a decent human being.

But let's get into the specifics. What values does Game of Thrones espouse that are so abhorrent to me as an SJW that I shouldn't bother watching the show? He opens with "Monarchy". No, seriously. He totally does. I'm not rearranging these for effect.

"But their love of Game of Thrones reveals that SJWs really love the pomp and circumstance that accompanies monarchy. This is what is behind their incessant praise of Obama’s vaunted intellect, Michelle’s great beauty, and how the Obamas have brought 'class' (an undemocratic concept) to DC."

Wow. Sebastian loves strawmen so much I bet he bought multiple Fleshlights just so he could strategically place them in a haystack and "hide his needle". Even ignoring the fact that "taking place in a monarchy" doesn't mean Game of Thrones is advocating for monarchy, which is the kind of mistake that Sebastian makes for the entire article, since when is admiring someone's intellect "pomp and circumstance"? I mean, sure, Sebastian has no direct experience with having his intellect admired, but that's still a hell of a misconception to be carrying around.

Also, pomp and circumstance isn't exclusive to monarchy. Nor, frankly, is it particularly a characteristic of the monarchies in Game of Thrones, The whole show is dark and grubby, and the monarchies are dark and grubby. So congratulations on connecting the dots between your weird cartoon versions of every single concept you include, but that doesn't make you insightful.

Thing two is "aristocracy", Game of Thrones is about one, liberals hate them, how can liberals like Game of Thrones, where the aristocracy is portrayed as a bunch of sister-fuckers, warmongers, and murder victims? Why don't they just go and read and watch all those medieval-style fantasy epics about communist democracies? Liberals are stupid.

Thing three? Violence! There's a whole thing about liberals, the Bundy takeover of the wildlife refuge that's just a steaming pile of false equivalencies, anecdotal evidence "one SJW acquaintance expressed glee...") and strawmen as far as the eye can see, but more importantly, this is where the real weird flaw in the article starts to come into play.

If, as the article claims, liking something that espouses values you claim to hate makes you a hypocrite, and Sebastian is presumably not a hypocrite, then Sebastion must like the values of monarchy, aristocracy, violence, and the as-yet-unmentioned "faith" and "homogeniety". But he consistently talks about the Game of Thrones portrayals of these things in negative terms including and especially faith, which he claims that, in GoT, is a tool atheists use to control the masses. So how can a man of faith who believes that the punishment should fit the crime like a show where faith is a tool of oppression and slaughtered willy-nilly?

I mean, that's not the only problem. He claims that liberals see Daenarys as the ultimate welfare queen, and his conclusion is some weird epic stretch that paints Sebastian and his compost cohorts as the oppressed masses under the tyrannical thumb of some Game of Thrones thing, But the overall takeaway is the incredible extent these sad fuckers have to go to to convince themselves they're under siege. If a show openly espouses liberal values, it's propaganda, and if a show doesn't espouse liberal values, it's proof that Hollywood liberals are hypocrites. The only impressive thing about it is how he managed to write it while jerking off to all the rape scenes.

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