Hypocrites, Fucking Morons, And Our Ruling Class

« October 2017 »

Memo to Tim Murphy, Donald Trump, and Mike Pence: YOU ARE ALL FUCKING MORONS.

Our politics are so completely fucking awful. IDIOTS SAY THE DAMNDEST THING!

"I get what you say about my March for life messages. I've never written them. Staff does them. I read them and winced. I told staff don't write any more. I will." - PretendSoon to be former Republican congressman Tim Murphy, explaining why it’s OK to urge his mistress to get an abortion.

I’d like to thank Tim Murphy for exposing the dark secret behind the abortion debate, which is that EVERYBODY LOVES ABORTION. Oh, Republicans hate it in the abstract, and Democrats pretend to disapprove of it, but if the right can constantly tell me there are no atheists in foxholes, then I can tell them everyone is pro-choice the day after a missed period. Especially when the missed period is the one of oops not your wife FAMILY VALUES!

But what I like about this is that it at least shows that some of our unwritten political rules remain intact even in the age of Trump. In a matter of days, Murphy went from “embattled”, to “not running for re-election” to “resigning in disgrace”. It’s nice to see a modicum of shame still holds sway in American politics, because it’s the only enforcement mechanism we’ve got.

“I think it's fake news, but if he did that, I guess we'll have to compare IQ tests. And I can tell you who is going to win.” - President Garbage, still cranky about being a fucking moron.

Donald Trump doesn’t realize he’s flunked literally every possible means to assess his intelligence during the entire length of time he’s been in public life. I can only assume he thinks he’d score well on one because every time he’s taken one, someone has lied to him about the final score. And awarded him bonus credit for knowing the ocean was big.

This, of course, is part of his ongoing feud with Secretary of State Rex Tillerson, who is just smart enough to know how dumb Trump is but not smart enough to avoid taking the job. This is in addition to his latest feud with Bob Corker, further proving that everybody hates him and knows he’s a dangerous idiot. I just hope all the reporting on all the people trying to keep the dangerous idiot contained doesn’t hurt their ability to keep the dangerous idiot contained.

“I left today's Colts game because @POTUS and I will not dignify any event that disrespects our soldiers, our Flag, or our National Anthem.” - Vice President Mike Pence, inexplicably desperate for attention.

Keep in mind that the sad part is not that Mike Pence spent six figures (reports vary, but they’re all six figures) to fly to a football game he knew he’d be walking out of, as evidenced by him telling the press to wait in their van until the anthem had concluded and he could walk out. I mean, that’s A sad part, certainly, but it’s not THE sad part.

THE sad part is that Pence’s stupid, boring stunt marked Rich White America’s decision that they’d had enough of letting black football players express opinions, thank you very much. First the Cowboys owner threatened to bench players for not standing, then ESPN suspended Jeanette HIll for criticizing the Cowboys’ owner, and now the NFL commissioner is considering forcing all players to stand during the anthem. Sorry, everyone. Rich White America has shit to get around to, and Mike Pence is their bland harbinger.