Thanks For The Words

« September 2017 »

Memo to Jason Spencer, No Really Jim Fucking Bakker, and Jeff Sessions: YOU ARE SO BAD AT YOUR JOB.

Words! They mean things, ostensibly! Ideally, each word represents a univerally agreed-upon concept, allowing communication between individuals. In practice, of course, we're fucked, because words are how IDIOTS SAY THE DAMNDEST THINGS!

"Continue your quixotic journey into South Georgia and it will not be pleasant. The truth. Not a warning... I can guarantee you won't be met with torches but something a lot more definitive. People in South Georgia are people of action, not drama. - Georgia state representative Jason Spencer, threatening his colleague for her support for removing Confederate monuments.

For the record, Spencer claims his many Facebook posts, excerpted above, constituted a warning, not a threat, even though the posts themselves claim to be a fact, not a warning. Of course, the "fact" in question is "Jason Spencer endorses and condones Deliverance-style redneck vigilante justice against a black female lawmaker", but hey, them's just facts.

And, again, this is an elected official talking shit like this against a fellow elected official, mad because she's sick of statues to losers who wanted to own her. Talk to me about the violent, extreme left when they start holding local office. Until then, choke on all the dicks and dicklike substances.

"If it happens, there will be a civil war in the United States of America. The Christians will finally come out of the shadows, because we are going to be shut up permanently if we're not careful." - Jim Bakker, on the possible impeachment of Donald Trump.

Hey, if you ever wondered if we'd be able to pull out of this anti-intellectual societal tailspin we seem to have been in for fucking ever, guess what? Jim Bakker is still a thing, and people are still listening to him! Yes, THAT Jim Bakker, for those of you older than 40, and yes, that Jim Bakker you just looked up on Wikipedia, for those of you younger than 40. If people are still listening to that fucker 30 years later, nobody will ever learn anything.

And if we're going to have a civil war when Christians come out of the shadows, well, we have to wait for them to get into the shadows first, because you can't swing a dead messiah around this fucking country without hitting half a dozen Christians in a megachurch passing a collection plate around to hurricane victims seeking shelter there after the church was forced to begrudgingly open its doors due to public pressure. As just, you know. One example.

The compassionate thing is to end the lawlessness, enforce our laws, and, if Congress chooses to make changes to those laws, to do so through the process set forth by our Founders in a way that advances the interest of the nation." - Jeff Sessions, continuing to put up with Donald Trump as long as he gets to hurt innocent people with more melanin than he considers ideal.

This, of course, was Sessions doing Trump's dirty work for him an announcing that the Deferred Action for Childhood Arrivals executive order from Barack Obama would expire in six months unless Congress turned it into a law. This is double-cowardly, as Trump couldn't even announce his own plan to blame Congress in March once 800,000 innocent former children get kicked out of the country because they trusted the government a few years back.

And apparently I have to say this these days, that enforcing laws isn't compassion unless the laws themselves happen to be compassionate. Although, to be fair to Sessions, he may think that "compassion" is a synonym for "gives me a boner", in which case, deporting innocent brown children would definitely feel like compassion to him. So six months from now, all the Confederate statues in Washington D.C. will wish they'd been melted down for scrap, if Congress doesn't act.