Whites, Gods, and Guns, Part Four Zillion

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Memo to Bruce Ash, E. W. Jackson, and Wayne LaPierre: YOU ARE DUMB.

Sometimes, bonus column days are a bit of an inconvenience. Not one I regret, mind you, but still a bit of an inconvenience. Sometimes, however, they are very useful, like when one blows one's quote-mocking wad all on one Texas senator, leaving a number of vital quotes unmocked. Today is such a day. IDIOTS SAY THE DAMNDEST THINGS!

"There are plenty of folks who are shuckers and jivers. There is nothing in my lexicon that has racial overtones." - Arizona RNC head Bruce Ash, missing the point in the traditional manner.

Ash had accused Barack Obama of "shucking and jiving" on Obamacare, of course. Ash should have to provide documentation covering all the times he's used the phrase to describe the actions of white people, since "plenty of folks" do it and he thinks it doesn't have racial overtones. I actually agree. It doesn't have racist overtones. It's just racist.

But this is 2013, and anyone who points out a racist's racism is immediately accused of "making it about race" by a bunch of other racists who want to keep being racist without getting in trouble for it. And the cycle continues.

"Any time you say, ‘There is no other means of salvation but through Jesus Christ, and if you don’t know him and you don’t follow him and you don’t go through him, you are engaged in some sort of false religion,’ that’s controversial. But it's the truth. - Virginia lieutenant governor candidate E.W. Jackson, being honest.

In defense of the noted king of the as-yet-unelected nutjobs Jackson, his comments came as part of a sermon, because he's a bishop. Not in his defense, the candidate for lieutenant governor of Georgia is a radical bishop who thinks non-Christians are false-god worshippers.

And yeah, "no religious test" works both ways, but I think we all know there are certain brands of fundamentalist, and fundamentally exclusive religion that are an incredibly bad mix with public service. So far, polls show an uncomfortably small majority of Virginians agree, but tribal politics always kicks in around this point and the (R) next to the name trumps all.

"No, the whole country knows the problem is there weren’t enough good guys with guns! When the good guys with guns got there, it stopped." - NRA figurehead Wayne LaPierre.

So much for the 1:1 ratio of good guys with guns to bad guys with guns we were told was so vital after Newtown. Now it takes an unspecified, never-enough quantity of good guys with guns to stop a bad guy with a gun.

What nobody ever mentions, of course, is that the threshold of stopping a bad guy WITHOUT a gun is always going to be lower than the bad guy with the gun. And since that bad-guy-with-gun threshold seems to be increasing with every single mass shooting, maybe we should start mentioning that.