You Are Dumb, which is not a blog, posts new columns every weekday, except for most Tuesdays and the occasional fuckbotch. It is also a Twitter feed, @youaredumb, with content in a similar vein but much shorter. For a take on what a blog by me would be like, check out OLDNERD.
Memo to Tom Tancredo: HOW DO YOU MANAGE IT?
If there's anyone I should be done with on this website after nine fucking years, it's Tom Tancredo. I don't even know what he does for a living anymore now that he's done losing political races. I guess people pay him to yell at brown people on talk radio or something.
Tancredo, who is still in Colorado, apparently supported the recent referendum to legalize marijuana in the state, which doesn't really make any sense to me given what I know about Tancredo, but whatever. He appeared in a film promoting the referendum, and, presumably as a result of his support, was convinced the thing wouldn't pass.
So he bet the filmmaker, on film, that if by some miracle a political cause he associated himself with managed to succeed, he would partake of the devil weed under controlled and legal circumstances.
Since, as you probably know, the state with Denver came out solidly in favor of the "state of Denver", so Tancredo went on Fox News* to prepare the world for Stoned Tancredo. I don't know what that would be like, really. Although there's no way it could make him more paranoid.
"Look, I made a bet with the producer of the film that if Amendment 64 passed (I did not think it would) that I would smoke pot. I will therefore smoke pot under circumstances we both agree are legal under Colorado law. Hey, it's better than having to do a stupid dance as (Denver) Mayor (Michael) Hancock must perform as a result of losing a bet on the Broncos beating the Ravens."
There you go. Personal responsibility. Accepting the consequences of your actions. Impugning the manhood of a fellow politician to make yourself feel better about losing. All solid, core, Republican values. Say what you like about Tom Tancredo, but at least he's an honest, forthright Mexican-hater.
"I am especially concerned that the publicity may cause my grandkids to have to justify my actions to their peers and afraid that no matter how many times I say I am NOT condoning the use of marijuana, that that message will not get through. My grandchildren are extremely precious to me and I would never want to do anything that puts them in a difficult situation." - Tom Tancredo, explaining why personal responsibility and the consequences of his actions can go fuck themselves.
So let me get this straight-edge. Tancredo supported marijuana legalization, does not condone the use of marijuana, and is incapable of explaining to his grandchildren that he only smoked it once because he made a stupid bet? I don't know how to apportion the giant pile of stupid that implies, but there's definitely plenty to go around.
Ah well. At least Tancredo can personify another Republican value. Mouths writing checks their asses can't cash.
*I mean, they'll hire Erick Erickson, a.k.a. CNN's sloppy seconds, so they clearly will talk to anybody.