So Much For The Triumph Of Reason

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Memo to Karen Handel, Bill McCollum, and John Boehner: YOU ARE QUINTESSENTIALLY DUMB.

Sometimes it gets lost in the general flow of bitching about conservatives and crazy people, but You Are Dumb Dot Net remains primarily about stupidity. The lack of reason. The failure to think. I remain staunchly anti-anti-intellectual here. It's not just about demonizing the people I disagree with, it's pointing out their faulty reasoning, or, as in today's column, their complete, utter, and deliberate avoidance of it. And even better, none of it's about the goddamned Cordoba House. IDIOTS SAY THE DAMNDEST THINGS.

"Because I don’t." - Karen Handel, who, at the time, was in the middle of unsuccessfully running in the Republican primary for governor of Georgia.

Obviously, from the lack of context, Karen Handel was answering a question. A question that wanted to know why. Wanted to get at the reasoning underlying her stated beliefs. At this point, it doesn't even matter what the fucking question was. Because whatever the question was, her answer was tautological, unthinking bullshit. Why don't you? Because I don't. That's not an answer, it's a confession. An admission of guilt in the court of dumb.

For the record, though, the question was from a Georgia local newscaster, and was "I guess I want to know why you think gay parents aren’t as legitimate as heterosexual parents." Because Handel, in an attempt to fend off her eventually successful opponent's charges that she was cozy with the homos by speaking out against gay adoption. So she tacked right to win votes, couldn't come up with a decent reason for it when challenged, and lost anyway. So fucking stupid.

"He was the only available witness that had the credentials, willing to testify, and willing to produce the evidence. What we needed to have done was to put the records in the evidence. He's not a scientist, like somebody who does experiments or issues his own opinions. He's simply a scholar. He was producing the written reports, and the records, and the studies that had been done, and introducing them into evidence." - Florida attorney general Bill McCollum, explaining why he needed George Rekers, but not in a gay way.

Still in the realm of the gayhate, we have Bill McCollum. Unlike Handel, McCollum had a reason for hiring George Rekers to testify about the evils of gay adoption in Florida. Rekers, as you may recall, is the guy who got busted bringing a male escort on vacation.

But here's the thing. If there's only one guy with the credentials to say gay adoption is bad, the only guy willing to say it, and the only guy who claims to have evidence, that's a hint. The fact that he's not a scientist is also a hint. A hint that what he's saying is complete bullshit.

I mean, seriously. If you can find only ONE DUDE in all of Florida with enough shreds of credibility to argue against gay adoption, that should make you rethink your opinion even before you find out that your "expert" is a self-hating closet case. But McCollum won't quit, and is trying to ruin the lives of gay couples in Florida just so he can become the governor.

Oh, by the way, gay adoption? Still illegal in Florida, still the only state where that's true.

"Well, I don’t need to see GDP numbers or to listen to economists. All I need to do is listen to the American people, because they’ve been asking the question now for 18 months, “where are the jobs?" - John Boehner, explaining where he gets all his awesome ideas.

John Boehner is right. He doesn't need to see facts and listen to experts who know what they're talking about. Because nobody will ever hold him accountable for being wrong. In the information age, you don't need to be right, you just need to be able to point to someone who believes the same things as you and cite them, in one big circle-jerk of not-fact not-checking.

And fuck, Boehner didn't even bother to do that. When confronted with statistics and expert opinions that contradicted his anti-stimulus stance, he just arbitrarily ascribed his views to 250 million people and, safe in the knowledge that they all agree with him, went on his merry way. Somehow, Boehner assumed that he could get away with this boehner without Fox News Sunday's Chris Wallace calling him on it.

I kid Fox, of course, because they do suck moose balls through Sarah Palin's favorite bendy straw. But Boehner would have gotten away with it on 95% of the network and cable news shows, because that's how the game is played, and barely anybody - not even the cable news hosts who are ostensibly "on the left", challenges this ridiculous, anti-reason bullshit to the face of those who espouse it.

Which is, by the way, one of the main reasons I'm going to have to talk about the thrice-damned motherhumping manufactured mosque controversy at least one more time tomorrow.