You Are Dumb, which is not a blog, posts new columns every weekday, except for a couple of days each month when it doesn't. It is also a Twitter feed, @youaredumb, with content in a similar vein but much shorter. My spinoff food site, Forkbastard, can be found easily enough by the clever.
Archive - Jan 2012
Memo to the MPAA, Richard Floyd, and Rick Perry: YOU ARE DUMB.
As you can see, I'm not participating in the SOPA blackout protesting the Stop Online Piracy Act, although Wikipedia's participation may have a secondary effect, leading to a partial You Are Dumb blackout regarding ages, dates, and curricula vitae of certain individuals. I certainly won't be writing anything about Liverpool football players while it's protesting, that's for damn sure.
But I do support the blackout, and oppose SOPA, because, well, I know what the Internet is, and how it works, and I know what Congress is, and how IT works, and the last thing I need are a bunch of lunkhead congresscritters, bribed by the entertainment industry into believing that the Series Of Tubes is clogged with the scurvy hair of evil pirates, fucking with the flow of information. I need the flow of information, because that's how I learn that IDIOTS SAY THE DAMNDEST THINGS!
"It is an irresponsible response and a disservice to people who rely on them for information use their services. It is also an abuse of power given the freedoms these companies enjoy in the marketplace today. It’s a dangerous and troubling development when the platforms that serve as gateways to information intentionally skew the facts to incite their users in order to further their corporate interests." - the Motion Picture Association of America's statement on the SOPA blackout, which is funnier than 80% of the "comedies" that will be released this year.
I think this quote should officially shut down the internerd arguing over whether the blackout is a good idea or not. The MPAA thinks it's a bad idea. The MPAA thought NC-17 was a good idea. The MPAA are morons. And clearly, the MPAA is running scared. SOPA's on the ropes, and it's been entirely the result of bad publicity about how awful a bill it is. And while correlation doesn't equal causation, I'm willing to gamble a few days without Wikipedia, Reddit, or I Can Haz Cheezburger on those trend lines.
And if you desperately need to be entertained during the blackout, just remember the momentous chutzpah required for the MPAA to criticize Wikifuckingpedia for taking a political stance to further corporate interests. That's the pot telling George Lucas nobody will buy an all-black kettle unless Tyler Perry makes it.
"I believe if I was standing at a dressing room and my wife or one of my daughters was in the dressing room and a man tried to go in there — I don’t care if he thinks he’s a woman and tries on clothes with them in there — I’d just try to stomp a mudhole in him and then stomp him dry. Don’t ask me to adjust to their perverted way of thinking and put my family at risk. We cannot continue to let these people dominate how society acts and reacts." - Tennessee state representative Richard Floyd, indicating his fervent desire to commit a hate crime.
Apparently that Macy's policy is leading to some serious old-school reactionary bigotry, especially in America's Dumbest State. Fun fact - you cannot legally change your gender in the eyes of the Tennessee government. So that means that the bill Brown is proposing - that would nullify store policies and make it illegal for transgender people to use bathrooms and changing rooms appropriate to their gender - would affect every transgender person unfortunate enough to be in Tennessee, even those who've had full gender reassignment surgery.
And all so that Richard Floyd can avoid being tempted to literally, based on his own words, assault transgender people within an inch of their lives under the misguided fear that they somehow present a "threat" to his wife or daughters by trying on dresses. Oh, Tennessee. Other states may try, but they'll never displace you from the top spot in hate and stupidity.
"Not at all. A country that allowed a hundred and forty, a hundred and sixty honor killings, I will tell you, that is not a country that America wants to be associated with. A country that referred to the Israel flotilla attack as an act of war. I mean, this is a country that is becoming more and more aggressive toward a true American ally in that area, and that is Israel. So the idea that Erdogan's* regime has somehow or another earned our respect is not correct... I said that if they are treating their citizens that way, that they approach that terminology. - Rick Perry, explaining why he called the Turkish government "Islamic terrorists" the other day.
Well, what he actually said wasn't that they approach the terminology. What he said is that "many people perceive them" to be Islamic terrorists, and indicated that he was one of those many. Now, honor killings are many things. They're barbaric. They're primitive. They have no place in a modern world. But they're not terrorism, and letting them slide, assuming Perry's even correct in his assertion (always a tricky bet), isn't terrorism either. Nor is it approaching that terminology. It's bad behavior, sure, but there's a whole lot of bad behavior we tolerate from members of NATO and allies of America.
Luckily, a new poll came out yesterday that showed Perry making a strong third-place showing. In Texas. The state he actually runs. And call me a cynical leftie, but I really don't think it's because they want to keep him for themselves. The upside to Perry coming in third? He might actually forget he's running for President. Let's see, there's Romney, Santorum, and... and... sorry. No. Oops.
*Man, that blackout's gonna sting, because nobody had a transcript of Perry's interview with that spelling.