Archive - Dec 16, 2009

Say, It Ain't So, Joe

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Memo to Joe Lieberman, Joe Lieberman, Joe Lieberman, and Joe Lieberman: YOU ARE DUMB.

Some of you may have some understandable confusion about the regular features here on You Are Dumb Dot Net and how they differ from regular columns. For example, yesterday's column featured a series of quotes, with a vague thematic tie, and my ever-pithy comments on those quotes. Yet it did not qualify as Idiots Say The Damndest Things, even though they were, and they did. Today, on the other hand, we have a selection of three quotes, all by the same person, all on the same subject, and it does qualify for IDIOTS SAY THE DAMNDEST THINGS. What's the difference? I'll tell you. These quotes are in bold.

"Congressman Weiner made a comment that Medicare-buy in is better than a public option, it's the beginning of a road to single-payer. Jacob Hacker, who's a Yale professor who is actually the man who created the public option, said, 'This is a dream. This is better than a public option. This is a giant step.'" - Joe Lieberman, explaining to the New York Times why he swung his wrinkled old dick and knocked the most recent health care compromise on its ass.

I think it's time for my periodic reminder that I was hating Joe Lieberman before it was cool. Never, ever trust in the intellect of a man who thinks a Dana Plato Sega CD game is going to ruin a generation of children. But nobody listened, then Al Gore picked him as his running mate, a decision that doesn't get nearly as much blame for the Bush presidency as Ralph Nader does, which is a fucking shame. And then Connecticut turned its back on Ned Lamont. And what are we left with? Senator Droopy embracing the core principle of Republican politics - the politics of spite. Fuck him, and fuck everyone that's coddled his warmongering, Bill-Bennett-loving, sorry ass over the past ten years, up to and including Harry Reid, Rahm Emanuel, and Barack Obama.

"I'm getting to the position where I can say what I wanted to say all along, that I'm ready to vote for health care reform," - Lieberman, basking in the glow of news camera lights finally pointed at his pasty visage once again.

And once again, I have to remind everyone that this isn't about voting for or against health care reform. This is about voting for or against voting on health care reform. Let's put it bluntly, shall we? Lieberman is willing to caucus with the Republicans in a purely obstructionist attempt to prevent an up-or-down vote on health care reform unless he gets his way. And why is he able to do this? Because of a persistent and dismal failure by the Democrats in recent years to clearly distinguish procedural votes from actual votes, and a complacent media that enshrined sixty votes as the status quo for passing laws in the Senate, no matter what that pesky-ass Constitution says.

"And in the Connecticut Post interview I finally got to see that on TV last night and it looked to me like I was referring back to things I had supported in the past to make the point that though I was against the public option, I was not against health care reform. And, of course, I did that before the Finance Committee bill came out with this very large and again, I'd say, generous -- but I support it -- system of subsidies to bring basically lower and middle income people into the health insurance system." - The same press conference, when asked the only question that really matters.

And the only question that really matters is, how the fuck can Joe Lieberman get away with calling Medicare buy-in an unacceptable dealbreaker when, just three months ago, he avidly supported, and proposed, that same idea in a Connecticut Post interview? I shouldn't say that the question really matters, actually. That's the kind of mindset that leads to thinking Tim Russert was a good interviewer. What really matters is evaluating the quality of the answer, which as you can see is sorely, sorely lacking.

First, there's the "finally got to see that" evasion, like it's some bit of ancient history that happened to some entire other dude. Not himself three fucking months ago. I know he looks all saggy and old, but if he has to see shit he said on TV three months ago to figure out what happened, he should probably retire now. And then his actual answer is a half-assed analysis of what he thinks the tape of what he said looks like. That is what we call an unacceptable answer, so fuck anyone who accepts it.

"It seems to me when advocates for the public option saw they didn't have the votes for the public option they tried to go down another path." - Again, Joe, the same interview.

Yeah, it seems that way to me too, sort of. Because the vote they didn't have was yours, the path they tried to go down was one you said you liked, and the part you left out was where you fucked them all over anyway, because you knew you could get away with it and please your Aetna overlords. And you are getting away with it, which brings me back to a decade's worth of fuck-you's to Lieberman's buddies in the Democratic Party. Hope you're enjoying how that's working out for you.