Memo to entropy: FUCK YOU.

It's my birthday, and as is You Are Dumb Dot Net tradition, I take the day off. But not the way I normally take the day off, no. On my birthday I give you all a little something to tide you over until the next column. So what am I doing instead of hating John McCain? I'm playing Super Smash Brothers Brawl.

And why am I playing Super Smash Brothers Brawl? Because I am a late-life Nintendo convert, and because you have got to respect any game that decides it needs to have Will Wright as a weapon. And the character roster is DEEP. I've only unlocked a couple of characters, but even I've hit some major surprises:

He's fairly slow, but if you hit down plus B, he lets out a devastating indictment of the mainstream media. He made Pikachu cry, and convinced the Ice Climbers to run for their local school board to overturn the creationist majority.