Archive - Apr 4, 2006

Your Dumblet For Today

« April 2006 »

The dumblet. A concept mentioned before, but rarely used. A nugget of dumb too short to make into an entire column, but without similar items to take advantage of the add-n-pad technique. Such as.

Memo to Condoleeza Rice: THIS IS YOUR FUCK OFF MOMENT.

"I am quite certain there are going to be dissertations written about the mistakes of the Bush administration. I know we've made tactical errors, thousands of them, I'm sure." - Condoleeza Rice, March 31, 2005.

"First of all, I meant it figuratively, not literally. Let me be very clear about that. I wasn't sitting around counting. The point I was making to the questioner ... is that, of course, if you've ever made decisions, you've undoubtedly made mistakes. - Condoleeza Rice, April 1, 2005.

Gee, I wonder who's April Fools joke involved waking up to a horse's head in her bed? And they probably made Josh Bolten put it there as part of his initiation rites.

Regardless, FUCK OFF, CONDOLEEZA. You're not the President. You know what words mean. Quite. Certain. Mistakes. Errors. Thousands. Sure..... FIGURATIVELY?

Was it one of those newfangled Bushite metaphors, then? Can we put it next to "last throes"? When you go to work for Dubya, do you get a bomb collar that starts beeping loudly when you start making sense? This isn't the first time this has happened. Remember the President backpedaling on "you can't win a war on terror"? His one lucid moment ever, and he was backpedaling so fast he gave Lance Armstong whiplash.

But what the hell. They're only words.